Giants All Star Game Recap: Pablo Sandoval Proves David Wright is Inferior

just farted lol!

            There’s a general feeling among many people that the All Star game doesn’t matter. Sure, Bud Selig created ‘meaning’ to the game by allowing it to determine home field advantage in the World Series, but generally an All Star game is viewed as an exhibition. I honestly don’t remember what happened last year. I just remember something about Kevin Correia being there and then blacking out. I woke up, and then Kevin Correia was still an All Star. This is the world we live in.

            Yet All Star Games like these make you remember why this game is so darn amazing. Even in my personal imaginary land All Star Game, I had Pablo Sandoval swinging at 3 pitches towards the moon, and then that being it for him. Yet Pablo washed all those fears away with one swing. Best part of all was it was a classic Pablo swing. That pitch had no business being hit, it looked up mid break and told Pablo “bro, I’m heading right towards the inside corner and you and your front foot can’t do anything about it.” Yet this was not the first time Pablo has been told this by a baseball, and he lunged out, with barely any lower body in the swing, and hammered the ball off the right field wall, missing a home run by inches. Pablo Sandoval everybody. 

Via Every6thDay

Best case scenario doesn’t even begin to describe this game. Matt Cain was practically perfect if not for Sandoval’s gaffe in the first. Check out the locations of two swing through strikes he got off the major league leader in homeruns. One of them was a foul tip held on to by Buster Posey.

To use a Kruk term, that’s just country hard ball. Fastball right down the throat. Matt Cain’s just saying “here’s my fastball Jose! Here you go! Gift wrapped and everything!” I don’t recommend doing that again, but Jose Bautista is in the AL and we never have to see him again, so yippy! All I know is Matt Cain owns Jose Bautista.

Buster Posey was the least shiny of the 4 players, but he did coax a walk and Verlander. Plus, do you recall that last season his ankle was bent backwards in a way not even completely mad and deranged Yoga phsychos recommend? At this time last season he was on crutches, and one squat would be an immediate trip to the ER. All of the sudden you look up and he’s catching 5 innings of the All Star game. That’s really all that matters.

Of course, there’s Melky Cabrera, who is not Jonathan Sanchez, and I applaud you Brian Sabean for that. Just throw out all the crazy BABIP numbers for just a sec, and look at what this guy did. He was worth less than a replacement level player in 2010, and according to Cabrera was “eating everything.” He was traded to the Giants in a deal many including myself did not like, because he was worse than a replacement level player 2 years ago. Now he’s MVP of the All Star game, and a San Francisco phenomenon. Just the pure scene of him, his mom and his grandma is something everyone can appreciate. Regression can wait for another day.

*****

Then there's Matt Kemp talking to Melky Cabrera. In case you missed it, here's what happened:

Melky Cabrera has just hit a home run and is smiling. He immediately see's Matt Kemp, and unsmiles upon the sight of Matt Kemp's smile.

Meanwhile, Starlin Castro is being clueless.

Melky Cabrera wants out. He looks to the stands for a secret passage. There is none. He just wanted to celebrate his home run and then Matt Kemp started smiling and hugging him and the whole thing. He better not touch my head.

In the background, Pablo Sandoval is showing off his hands to nobody. He's a character.

Starlin Castro is wondering where short stop is.

Matt Kemp has touched Melky Cabrera's head. Melky tries to go to his happy place. He is not happy.

Starlin Castro update: "Matt Kemp is a ridiculous person. Also I found shortstop!"

Melky Cabera calms down and, desperate to leave Matt Kemp, explains to him that he'd love to talk, but he's has to go walk somewhere with healthy hamstrings. 

Starlin Castro determines baseball is boring.

This All Star Game was just super.